An old lady goes
to the doctor and says, "I have this really bad flatulence problem, but they don't
stink and don't make a sound."
The doctor says "O.K., take two of these pills every day for two weeks and come
back."
A week later the lady comes back really mad and says, "Now, not only do I fart
a lot, but they stink really bad!"
The doctor then said, "Now that we have your sinuses cleared, let's work on your
hearing!"
A beautiful, voluptuous
woman goes to a gynaecologist. The doctor takes one look at this woman and all
his professionalism goes out the window.
Right away he tells her to undress. After she has disrobed he begins to stroke
her thigh. As he does this he says to the woman, "Do you know what I'm doing?"
"Yes," she says, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities."
"That's right," says the doctor. He then begins to fondle her breasts. "Do you
know what I'm doing now?" he asks.
"Yes," the woman says, "you're checking for any lumps of breast cancer."
"That's right," replies the doctor. He then begins to have sexual intercourse
with the woman.
He says to her, "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yes," she says. "You're getting herpes."
10. Get ahead faster in corporate America.
9. Get a blow job.
8. Find out what is so fascinating about beating the meat.
7. Pee standing up while talking to other men at a urinal.
6. Determine WHY you can't hit the bowl consistently.
5. Find out what it's like to be on the other end of a surging orgasm.
4. Touch yourself in public without thought as to how improper it may seem.
3. Jump up and down naked with an erection to see if it feels as funny as it looks.
2. Understand the scientific reason for the light refraction which occurs between a man's eyes and the ruler situated next to his member which causes two inches to be added to the final measurement.
1. Repeat number 9......
